I will Survive!!

I actually feel good right now!
I am done with him!
I started with not calling him,
and now he's been online and I did not start a conversation!
He said hi and all I said was Hello.

But then I was looking around on youtube and found a video, of a song I knew a long time ago. But right now it has a lot of meaning, and I should to send the link to him (which for sure i wont do that!)

I will Survive! I FEEL GREAT RIGHT NOW!

Song Title: I WILL SURVIVE!

First I was afraid
I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never live
without you by my side
But I spent so many nights
thinking how you did me wrong
I grew strong
I learned how to carry on
and so you're back from outer space
I just walked in to find you here
with that sad look upon your face
I should have changed my stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I had known for just one second
you'd be back to bother me

Go on now go walk out the door
just turn around now
'cause you're not welcome anymore
weren't you the one who tried to break me with goodbye
you think I'd crumble
you think I'd lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive
as long as i know how to love
I know I will stay alive
I've got all my life to live
I've got all my love to give
and I'll survive
I will survive

It took all the strength I had
not to fall apart
kept trying hard to mend
the pieces of my broken heart
and I spent oh so many nights
just feeling sorry for myself

I used to cry
Now I hold my head up high
and you see me somebody new
I'm not that chained up little person
still in love with you
and so you felt like dropping in
and just expect me to be free
now I'm saving all my loving
for someone who's loving me


http://youtube.com/watch?v=Xv6lHwWwO3w&feature=related

goodbye is the only way??

I hide my problems behind a smile...

I feel broken and don't know if I can be repaired...

Everything back to the square again...

Goodbye is the only way??

Feeling empty again ~

I'm feeling that emptiness and yearning again. My chest is heavy and I feel like a have a knot in my stomach. I didn't have any caffeine today either. I still can't pin point why I'm feeling like this. I guess a part of me is bored with life. I just feel like there is nothing for me to do in life. I'm just not excited about life or about the future anymore.

Right now, at this very moment, life has no meaning. I used to express my feelings and thoughts through words, but for about a year I have lost all inspiration. I just don't know what the fuck is wrong with me.

Everything comes to an END!!

Everything comes to An End!!

God!! Please give me strength to move on!!

Something is missing!!

I feel like there is something missing in my life. I have this deep yearning in my heart.

I can literally feel it. It feels like a knot deep in my stomach, my chest feels heavy and every time I try to think about what I'm feeling, I get light-headed and a bit confused.

Although, part of that feeling could be because I just had a couple cups of coffee. Caffeine always makes me feel a bit light-headed: which is why I love it.

Oh well. I'm sure the feeling will come back. Hopefully, in a time when I'm not loaded with caffeine... although, I'm rarely seen without some sort of caffeine, either coffee or tea.

Life is becoming dull again~

I'm so bored! Seems like there is nothing to do - nothing to do where I live anyway. e of people on this website who live close to me. something that doesn't really interest me right now.

My life has been reduced to sitting at home watching tvb series, reading, or browsing the internet. Granted, that's probably all my fault, but... I just hate the people I know. There is someone, though, who I admire and look up to. I wish we could hang out, but he's an ocean away. We have lots in common and he's so easy to talk to. Plus, he's a genius and it feels like he's the only way I can really have intelligent, deep conversations with. Sometimes it feels like just being at home watching tvb series or reading is easier.

I wish I could trade lives with someone just once to see what it's like to do something different. Like trade lives with someone from Europe. I'm sure their lifestyle is completely different from mine. Shit!!!... I'm just so bored.